The Ability to Respond

Scaling Mount Everest is a mark of ‘capability’ and ‘courage’ against all odds. Returning intact from the expedition is an achievement; a testimony of an ‘outstanding ability’. But the concern shown towards your expedition team, assisting them, and ensuring that they too return safely along with you is your unbounded ‘ability’. Your ability is a response to the team’s near and dear. You were never asked for it, but you extended it. ‘Ordinary’ people turn to ‘extraordinary’ with highly refined response; in other words, they gear up their ability to achieve the maximum results to share with the society. Mahatma Gandhi, Mother Teressa, Martin Luther King, Nelson Mandela, and even our own entrepreneurs such as Bharat Ratna JRD Tata, and Wipro Premji, are a few examples of ‘extraordinary’ humans. They have become superhumans exhibiting their sheer ability in response to society’s needs. In the process of understanding the above great personalities, I went to deep study to find the basics of such profound personalities.

There are two elements or players in this act of ‘responsibility’; first is the one which ‘provokes’ or ‘invites’ an action, and the other is the one which demonstrates the ‘ability to respond’. Together is the battle between the two elements, but we construe it as one i.e., responsibility. When the action is greater, and in return if the response is poor, then it is ‘inability’, and when the response is greater than the action, then it is intense ability. The meaning of ‘responsibility’ common in all dictionaries is ‘the ability or authority to act or decide on one's own, without supervision’. Which means that the ability to respond should rise or flow from one’s awareness or wisdom which is only by refined perception, and it can be achieved by acquiring true knowledge of who you are and your role in this world. The etymology clearly stated in the reference has ‘without supervision’ inserted as a condition.

One day, I took a Tennis Ball, a Cricket Ball, and a Basketball for my experiment. First, I chose a strong cemented brick wall. I considered the wall as the hypothetical ‘ability’ of a person and playballs as the ‘circumstances’. I threw each of the balls one by one with equal power against the wall and recorded the bounce. The Tennis Ball, returned with a long bounce; the Cricket Ball had the least, and the Basketball moderately between the two. The return bounce is the measure of the ‘response’. Next, I chose a wall made of brick but no mortar in between. It was erected with mud as the adhesive medium. The Tennis Ball bounced but not far in response as earlier, the Cricket Ball did some damage to the wall and fell only a foot afar with a thud. The Basketball smashed into the brick wall damaging it considerably. If the playball is the severity of the circumstance, then the intensity of the throw is the impact, and the ‘wall’ is the person who is responding to the issue. The demonstration of our ability to respond to a situation shows how ‘weak’ or how ‘strong’ we are.

For example, suicides happen, but absolutely not because of intense situations. They happen because of the victim’s inability to respond. If the situation was such intense that there cannot be a response other than to commit suicide, then none of us could save ourselves from such circumstance. It is all because some do not fortify their mental abilities to respond to unfavorable or hard-hitting situations. Sometimes, a person can also turn violent. In any particular circumstance there is one in the waiting, which is the favorable resolution, available as a choice, but one had to recognize or identify it. Over a period of time, when we are capable to maximize our abilities to any continued adverse situation then resiliency develops, and the next stage is only victory.

Many of the failures, pain, and sufferings in the earlier part of my life were wrongly assumed by me that they were because of someone else’s actions. After deep introspection I realized they were due to the result of my own bad responses. Its sheer nonsense to believe that someone is responsible for the other’s fate. Its only because you disable your abilities. Hence mere circumstances do not decide results; it is the response which is the key. I recollect my earliest devastating blow in my life was at the age of 30. My conflict with my Uncle caused his sudden death due to a massive heart attack in the middle of the night. He died helplessly. The blow was catastrophic. It was a simple clash of ego between us. I recoiled too strong when he pushed me to an extreme end. Prior to his sudden death, the whole world was canvassing behind me and sympathizing with me declaring that my Uncle who was the head of the joint family and was aged 65 then, should not have stooped too low with false allegations against me. It actually gave a ripple effect. A small incident led to a big misunderstanding. Thereafter even my apology before all the family elders did not satisfy his ego. He realized I was gaining an advantage morally. The injury in the ego became larger, he wanted to prove to everyone he was right, and I was not to be sympathized. The gulf between us became wider day by day. I left the joint family and lived separately. Shockingly, on the day of his death, everyone’s opinion changed overnight. All fingers pointed at me. The family, friends, and society openly stated that I was the cause for his death. There was blood on my hands. My entire world turned upside down. The untimely death of my Uncle haunted me for more than two decades.

Opportunities and pitfalls are always around us, waiting patiently to ‘prey’ and navigate our fate to pain in case we fail, or grant us ‘future benefits’ if you make the right choice. In case you prefer to overpower the circumstances with emotion then you could enjoy the instant adrenaline of victory, but you lose the future priceless benefits and face only flak. I assumed I was a strong-willed person since my earliest days but whether was it exercised wisely, is the question I put to myself a few years ago. If I introspect analyzing my actions, then the earlier statement has to be reversed. Which means that even if I had the courage, it never manifested at all. Which also means that having the ability to respond to fierce circumstance, I cracked like the mud-wall.

After the incident of my Uncle’s death, the next major catastrophe was my business debacle in 2007. In fact, it was a predicted doom. Any moment my entire property would go for auction and I will be left on the road. This time I did not want to be hasty and go for impulsive choices. My first mission was to identify the weakness and threat, which according to me was the poor quality of legal advice that I was proximate to. A qualified consultancy was dear beyond my capacity in those circumstances. Hence in order to enrich it, I had to become my own consultant. This led to a pack of stringent procedures and multitasking. As I said earlier, I chose to master the quality only by responding to the circumstance that will lead to any consequence I was ready for. A five-year penance opened the flood gates with results. It was not just my friend Joseph praising me as stated in my earlier chronicle, but on the first day of 2013 at Coimbatore Debt Recovery Tribunal, in the Case filed by me for a Tirupur Client M/s.Match Point; the Presiding Officer, Shri Manmohan Anand showered praise on my work. The PO took about 15 to 20 minutes to go through the Securitization Appeal, and then looked up, “I have never seen this quality of preparation in a case until now. I was the Presiding officer at Chennai, Bangalore and now here at Coimbatore. This is the first time I am coming across such quality.” He pronounced “All coercive Measures contemplated by the Bank are Stayed!” The Bank Counsel raised objections, and the PO retorted, “I will give you a Month time to file your Counter, but I am sure you cannot file it even after 3 Months.”

I did not practice under any Senior Advocate but acquired the skills by gearing up my response to the circumstances. Today I represent before many Courts including High Courts and Tribunals. It gives me immense satisfaction when the Courts appreciate my arguments. Once I was contesting an IBC matter on behalf of a major Cement Company at the NCLT and the other side Counsel was a top Senior Designated Counsel and there was a tough battle between us for almost 6 months. Outside the Court, we used to greet each other with a smile or a ‘hello’. One day, as we came across, the Senior inquired, ‘Prem Sir, I have never come across you earlier. Where were you practicing?”. I replied, “I was an entrepreneur Mr.Reddy. I am just five years in practice.” He was shocked, ‘My Goodness!” he continued, “that’s really amazing. I should have imagined so by your ‘out of the box’ arguments.” He shook my hand “I am really happy to meet you Prem Sir.” It was an outstanding Compliment.

Recently, I had faced critical circumstances which again provoked response as in my younger days. I immediately placed it on paper as to how I should respond, and I framed my actions. Kept them in a closet and reviewed them every day for forty-five days. Reframed my action and revised the response. Finally, I stopped reviewing it. It was no use; the results will obviously aggravate and will definitely not tone down. I preferred to be the cement wall but looked as if I was becoming fragile like the mud wall. It was difficult, but possible. I experimented tuning my ability to respond. To be analytical, is the solution I found. I experimented to tone it down. I cannot be a saint but can redefine myself with introspection. What others think about me is not important. It is what I think about myself is the need for improvisation or enhancement of my abilities. I was satisfied to have made a good choice and bounced the issue to my ability.

It is unavoidable here that I have to make a reference to the ability of the great Yuddishtara. During the exile of Pandu Sons, Duryodhana and Karna were anxious to humiliate the Pandava Brothers who were in exile in the forests deprived of their Royal luxuries. Hence against the wishes of his elders, Duryodhana set off to Ghoshayatra, a sort of excursion to the wild, to showing off his pomp. Duryodhana camped near to the Pandavas and during his celebration got into trouble with a Gandharva King by name Chitrasena. Duryodhana, his brothers and Karna were defeated by Chitrasena and held in captivity. Coming to know of the incident, Yuddishtara instructed Arjuna and Bheema to confront Chitrasena and free their Cousins. Both Bheema and Arjuna were shocked by the directions of their elder brother and questioned him that why they should help Duryodhana who was the sole cause for all their misery? Yuddishtara stated that they might be differences between them 5, and the Kaurava 100, but they were 105 Brothers against any outsider; hence it was their duty to help their cousins. Arjuna defeated Chitrasena and set his cousins free. Even though Yuddishtara had the opportunity to vanquish his cousins and regain his lost Kingdom, he refrained from any such show of might and responded by upholding Dharma. That was his exemplary conduct in conformity with his principles.

My Uncle’s life ended prematurely. He could have lived longer. It was only because of my inability to respond to his fury. I could have waited for the wounds to heal, but I responded in such matter that it aggravated the situation. I did not take into consideration that he was the one responsible for my education in the best schools and colleges, and that he had groomed me with better values. I should have responded like a concrete wall, and not fallen like a mud wall, without any wisdom cemented in between my thoughts. It is a fact that my Uncle appeared in my dreams thereafter each and every night for almost two decades, always smiling, as if we had no conflict and we were living happily together; suggesting that I was too proud of myself rather than respect for the elders. I recollected all his noble deeds, his love and affection. He would have had a peaceful life, had I responded to his actions in the best of my ability with wisdom. Indeed, I miserably failed with a fragile response, even though the ability I found later during my introspection was coded within me, but I did not resource it. As defined in the dictionaries, the act of responsibility has to be without supervision only. This doctrine is not synonym to the “Cause & Effect” theory, but it’s prelude.